Help! I'm Becoming a Cynic!

A long time ago, I would never have questioned any desire to learn or do something new. Why else would I have self-studied Spanish, started a cacti and succulent collection, or created a website for Filipino writers when I was a teenager? I miss the old me who just did things for the fun of it. Today, whenever I am presented with an idea to learn or do something new, I always ask myself if it's worth the trouble and if I will get anything out of it. This is probably why I haven't done or learned anything new in the past few years of my life.

I read some articles online about cynicism and they say that part of it is being older. Being older means that you now have a jar of experiences that you can dip into whenever you're faced with decision-making. While it tends to take out the fun in life, cynicism is also useful because it makes us cautious and caution is always a good thing. Not too much of it, anyway.

I remember, a few years ago, while visiting my hometown, upon telling a relative that I wanted to visit Santa Cruz island and write about my experience, he asked me, why in the world would you want to do that? He even asked me sarcastically if I worked for the department of tourism. At the time, I really wasn't sure how to answer that question. I mean, I just wanted to do it for the sake of doing it. Does there really have to be a reason? Today, I find myself asking the same question whenever I want to try something new. 

In fact, just a few minutes ago, I was watching some videos about digital marketing because that was one of the things that I have always wanted to learn but after a few hours, I found myself starting to question the wisdom in doing it. So I gave up and wrote this blog post instead.

Here is an article to check if you are a cynic: 11 Undeniable Signs You're Becoming Cynical. Unfortunately, I exhibit 8 out of the 11 signs.  I shudder to think about it but is it possible that I am turning into the very people I swore to myself I would never turn into?

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